First Time

REMEMBER THE FIRST TIME YOU . . . .

Went on a date

Watch the sun come up

French kissed

Won a race

Failed a class

Played Hide-n-go-get

Rubbed the Kitty Kat and it purred

Went camping

Watched porn

Farted in front of a date

Ate Nina or sucked Dingaling

Stole from a store

Told your mom you hated her

Spit on somebody

Cussed out your teacher

Watched Sesame Street

Flew on an airplane

Sneeked out of the house

Got drunk

Prayed to God and confessed your sins

REMEMBER ALL THESE TIMES
FIRST ARE IMPORTANT BECAUSE
THEY ARE THE FOUNDATIONS OF
YOUR LIFE

What is love?

I really wanna know what love is?

I think I was in love maybe once or twice. Maybe three. But damn its been a long time. I'm kind of yearning for it now. I want that one who I will absolutely die for. Maybe I already have him? How do I know?

Sometimes, I flick on the tv and see folks kissing, I mean slobbing, tongue all down the throat and I wanna join in. I mean damn what does it take to feel like that? I want my titties to perk up. I want my pearl tonge to secrete. I want my heart to flutter like a butterfly. I want my palms to sweat. Sucks watching all these people holding hands, smooching, lubbing on each other.

I really wanna know what love is.

I wonder if its like the first time when I was 12 and playing Hiding-go-seek (well we used to play hiding-go-get). N E wayz, at 12, I remember my first crush. His name was Chris. Awwwww I'm saying as I remember his cute face. I used to get this funny little feeling in the pit of my stomach. I'm not quite sure how to compare the feeling, but I remember my panties use to get wet from just brushing up against him. I'd get chills that would run through my body. It was sort of like a quick high. Nice feeling.

I really wanna know what love is?

There was the real boyfriends when I was older. Something about the way they would make me feel. My back would arch and my booty would toot out, making me sweat. I had all these feelings going through my body. I can remember those feelings like yesterday. Wonderful. I'm smiling:)

I GUESS THAT WAS LOVE!

We Don't Always Understand

Sometimes we get dealt all these cards
and have no idea how to play them

At times, we look and see all Aces
and other times we notice straight Jokers

WE DON'T ALWAYS UNDERSTAND
how to play

Then there is the time when the phone rings
and its not who we want it to be

But by the time we finish listening to the caller
our heart smiles because we realize the message was necessary

WE DON'T ALWAYS UNDERSTAND
when its time to listen

Then there is love. Confusing as it is
Even though it hurts, we should embrace it

When we get it, why do we fight and refuse it?
We say we are guarding our feelings,
but really we are pushing away life's most precious gift

WE DON'T ALWAYS UNDERSTAND
that life should be full of love

We get special priveledges
and soon we find ourselves getting too comfortable

Before we know it, we've abused our rights
and are left fighting to regain the trust we've broken

WE DON'T ALWAYS UNDERSTAND
the meaning of trust.

Uncontrollable Thoughts

Okay, so the last time I had sex, I absolutely could not control my weird azz thoughts. I know yall will think I am strange, but I swear I must have an awful imagination! Check this out:



So I am laying on my back with my legs agap and the pillow is over my head. Whenever the pillow goes over Holirae's head, something strange is bout to go down. Its an early morning sex going on. He is eating my Nana. And I am aparently nowhere I need to be. I was way out in left field when perhaps I should have been on first base. There was no sex, just pure oral - all I was in the mood for.



Nonetheless, in my fantasy, I was a business man (and know that I am all woman). I wanted to get my dick sucked. I was working in my office. (I totally don't even work in an office). But yeah, I was feeling horney, so I decided to stop past the office building's public restroom in the mist of a break and met this male trick who must have worked in another department. But somehow, I lured him into the bathroom stall, where he sucked my dick. (Yeah, you heard me - the dick I don't have). Maybe I was totally bored with the guy who was really eating me out . . . don't know, but both the men were doing the damn thing. And I was jerking his head back and forth as his mouth clenched my dick and balls. In reality, the dude I was with, my pulling my coochie lips and I was loving it but just couldn't be there to feel him. UNCONTROLLABLE THOUGHTS.

I know you all think I am fu **** up! But if I said, it didn't happen that way, I'd be a liar. Make matters worse. I chilled with my pants down in the stall. Took my brief case and raised my hands up above my head like I was the motha-freeken-king of the land. LOL. Head was off the chain! Money shot all up in this tricks mouth.

Whoever, this dude was who was in my dreams - I wanna meet him! Guess I will never meet him, cause funny thing is I can't even see the face of the man who was sucking my imagainary dick. I do know his lips and tongue was real.

Now, I know I am not the only person who has been in such a crazy ass situation. To be honest, whenever I am getting ate out, I ALWAYS have these krazy UNCONTROLLABLE THOUGHTS. Here is a lsits: Can you add any?

FYI: Most of the time, I am the guy. Weird huh?

-Once I was getting my dick sucked in the alley way because my wife wouldn't do it the way I liked it. So often in my fantasies I will meet this stranger twice a day (lunch and after work) before I go home to my wife.

-Another time, I took my wife with me so she could learn how to suck me the right way. Her job was to watch these 3 other women suck me off. We were all in an abandoned building. In the end, my wife agreed to join in and learn the how to suck. She did the damn thang too.

-Another time, I was an older man who liked middle school girls. I was a dirty pimp who would only mess with the young girls. So there was one who I would have suck me off frequently when she got out of school. And the deal was, she could not ditch school to suck me off, because in my fantasy - I didn't want a dumb ho.

-Another time, (I was a girl this time) believe that? Anyhow, my boyfriend use to sneak over after school while mom was at work talking bout he had to have it. Many times, he would get a quickie and nut just before mom put the key in the door. There were other fantasies with this same guy who would come over and do me while we knew Daddy was outside the door listening.

Yes, Imma freek with my krazy ass UNCONTROLLABLE THOUGHTS!

Tell me bout yours?

Runway Love

I know there are tons of ladies out there like me who are just waiting for that Runway Love. What I mean is the one man you will walk down that aisle with? I'm in my early 3os and still am without a hubby and at times its quite depressing.



As girls in middle school, high school and college, we spend all this time deciding upon wedding colors and to think I may never get that opportunity to walk down that runway with my man in my awesome colors. By the time I got to college, I had narrowed down my colors to pale yellow and creamy white. I know weird, but hey its my (imaginary wedding).



I get so tired of people trying to play match maker. Those are the worst kind. Runway Lover, where the hell are you? We should be toasting drinks together, praying together, and loving each other. What the hell are you doing? In somebody's elses runway or what? At any rate, I'll be waiting because I refuse to settle for anyone less than the BEST.

People are constantly asking why, "Why aren't you married?" That freeken question drives me insane. The hell if I know. I immediatly wanna say, why are you divorced? I'd rather be single and sane than married and insane. Don't ask dumb azz questions.

I want my marriage to last. I don't know. I keep thinking this is God's devine plan to keep me single as long as possible until he feels I'm deserving of that Runway Love. And when I get him, Imma run down the aisle just like Kunta Kinte ran from the white man (as fast as a runnaway slave). Imma be running happy and in love to get to my man at the other end of the runway.

Its the holidays and here I am going to spend another holiday alone, or at least with someone who I'm not quite sure will accompany me down that runway. Is there any other ladies out there feeling like this or is it just me? Talk to me girls. I'm needing some positive feedback to lift my spirits.