THE WAR WITHIN US

War is within me. I know what your struggles are.
We fight for two different reasons, but from the same heart.
Your heart beats as you hide beneath trenches and mine beats to the sound of life - a silent life that screams to live.

Our struggles run deep. We are trapped within our own souls,
waiting to be discovered, yours by fellow soldiers and me, by myself. Isn't it funny how our souls are locked within?

You are a soldier at odds with other countries. Me, I'm an unmatched soldier of life, whose soul tarries like the wan soldier that sits in the infirmary, sick and waiting to be set free. Our uniforms are tattered from the wars we wear within us. Some call it caitiff. I call it prudence. The war within us won't let go.

We can't see the victory, but others somehow see it clearly. The war within us is neither past, nor present, but simply forever - at least, as long as our souls remain locked within this war.
Yours physical and mine internal.

The war whispers tell you to just get up and look over the trenches and you'll see freedom, but lassitude denies you strength. The war whispers try to tickle my soul as fond memories flash before my psyche, yet ire denies me strength.

Endorsed for your dauntless acts, soldier, continue to fight.
For your strength alone yields my sorrowful war within. You must continue to battle. For your war that will be victorious, calms my war, if only you will get up and look over the trenches. For they are waiting, but they can't see you because fear hides you I too think.

Fight my dear soldier. Fight.

Desolate soldiers such as me; depend upon your vigor for strength, hoping it will end my war within.

Fight my dear soldier. Fight

Look up over the trenches so we can both end the war within us!

I KNOW HER NOT

I know her not. She lurks in my memories and will not leave me alone. She is much like a shadow that never leaves. What must I do to cast her aside? She is here, but is not here. She is there, but is not there? Why? Please go away. I don’t understand why she doesn’t go away because she is really gone. The mere thought makes her present, but if I should open my eyes
I know her not!
Everyday she is in my face. I am forced to see her, to be in her presence. This figure that once really was my shadow is not any more. Please go away. Don’t you understand? I don’t want you! You cast me away and I am trying to do you the same.
I know her not!
There she goes again. Appearing in MY dreams. Is she crazy? Get out of my sleep. You didn’t really want to be here anyway. So why are you still here? I don’t understand. Why did you come when that was not where you really wanted to go? Who goes across the country and doesn’t want to go? What sense does that make? Go Go Go.
I know her not!
You have what you want. So why are you still here? The expression on your face tells me you never cared. I’m confused. Please go away. You have what you want. My head hurts. Why is my head hurting? I want you to hurt like me. You stupid bitch. Go the fuck away. I hate you.
I know her not!

Shadowless

What was almost like a shadow is no longer there. What ever I did, this figure did.
Not anymore. Who was I to think I could keep this shadow. Unworthy and pityfful as I, the shadow is gone. I've run it off. The shadow is no more. Who would ever think a shadow would leave you? How could a shadow leave, but yes, the shadow is gone.

For a while, I was the leader of the shadow. The shadow did what I did. When the shadow could no longer see its reflection, I was cast aside and a new reflection was found.

Where was I to go?
Now I am without shadow.
Alone and shadowless.